5th Group: What we can do to stop Intimate Partner Violence: a toolbox of intervention strategies
Created by George Arvanitis
Last updated by George Arvanitis 2 months 3 weeks ago
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We will give scenarios to group where an intervention is called for. Try to imagine yourselves in these situations, discuss them within your groups and write down what you would do. Imagine that you know the people in the scenarios but neither of them are close friends of yours –you’re just in the same group of friends.
You can use the “List of Strategies” as a guide to help you and add to the list any new suggestions that may be offered by the students.
LIST OF STRATEGIES
Below are some suggestions for enhancing the discussion of particular strategies:
STRATEGY: “Ask for clarifications…”
People who express attitudes connected to a violent culture expect people to go along with them, to laugh, to agree, to join in. They do not expect to be questioned. Saying, “I’m not clear about what you mean by that. Maybe you could explain?” or some other form of clarification helps to change the dynamic and flow of conversation. Also, people are encouraged to think about the assumptions that underlie their state ments and attitudes. It is especially important to question in a nonaggressive way.
STRATEGY: “Give… a face to the victim…”
This strategy rehumanizes the person being demeaned. Reminding someone that their sister, mother or girlfriend might be talked about or treated in this way often reminds people of women’s humanity.
STRATEGY: “Do not accuse… State your position clearly”
Ask participants how they feel when someone points the finger at them, when someone says in an accusatory voice, “YOU…..” Talk about how “I Statements” are easier for people to hear since they are about the person making the statement, about which people are less likely to become defensive. Instead of saying: “YOU are sexist and this is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard”, which puts the other in a defensive position, you could say: “I don’t agree with what you are saying; I believe that nobody deserves to be treated like this”
STRATEGY: “Use your humor…”
This is perhaps the trickiest of all the strategies since humor can easily escalate tensions if people feel they’re being mocked. However, if you use humor effectively, it can reduce the tension inherent in inter ventions. Be careful, though, not to be so funny that you undermine the point you’re trying to make.
STRATEGY: “… without words”
This strategy carries considerable weight with young people if you connect it with parents, who have the uncanny ability to communicate their displeasure with their children simply by staring at them. No words need to be spoken.
STRATEGY: “Seek others who are like you”
Studies indicate that 90 percent of boys/men are at times uncomfortable with how their male peers talk about or treat girls/women, but almost all remain silent because they believe they are the only ones who feel uncomfortable. This strategy is designed to let others know that they are not alone in their discomfort. For example, you might simply turn to the group and ask, “Am I the only one un comfortable with this?” This strategy can also be useful when you know someone who has a pattern of expressing violencesupporting attitudes. Friends and/or family can, as a group, do an intervention.
STRATEGY: “Ask for or offer help”
If you witness a violent incident it may be necessary to call the police and also ask for help from people around you. Do not intervene if you are alone and you feel that it could be dangerous. Another useful way to offer help would be to make your presence known so the perpetrator is aware that there is an eyewitness to his action. You could also offer your help to the victim by talking to her/him. This would help her/him feel safer, but you should also keep in mind that it would be better to talk to her/him after the incident is over.